Well i went away for Easter, up to the farm - and i had a wonderful time, what an amazing man - i am falling for him something bad, the ache in my heart hurts so much when I'm away from him , its hard to put into words what my heart feels. Can i really be this lucky?
I came home Wednesday, and since then i have been incredibly emotional, i don't know whats going on with me - I weighed in today and have gained 1.4kg - that hurts, i worked so hard this last 6 weeks and its all come undone over a week - I know i ate wrong, i picked a lot, had lots of refined carbs ( i learnt how to use a break maker! ) didn't drink enough water, drank soft drink, and i haven't done that for 6 weeks, it was all wrong! At the time i didn't care but now I'm home I'm cursing myself - I will keep going cause I'm stronger than that - but it still hurts.

I missed my kids a lot, they went to their fathers wedding, and when they came home showed me the pics, and i just sobbed, cried my heart out - seeing the man i was once going to marry all married and very happy, hit a note in me i haven't seen - ever, don't get me wrong, i wasn't jealous or anything like that, we split up 3-4 years ago, no love there - that chapter of my life is now officially closed.

I'm also not feeling well, sore throat headaches etc.. all makes it very hard to pick myself up outta this emotional hole i am in - I know everything will be OK... Just gotta lift.